The Loki Dance

As A Result (I is the word)

PART 1
Say to me every beauty dies
say to me every beauty has it's lie
and he had an ego the size of which
left no room for a good penis
no beauty could stay around him
and I, myself, have evidence of
when I could not keep myself in line
all the lines on my body show
what will happen when we let our psyche lie
either way, either way, either way
there needs to be balance
and she stored insults in her pocket
and she will pull one out for me
and she says I am so self absorbed
"I" is the word before every sentence
I am sure that she is right
I- say it again
say to me every beauty must die
say to me there is something
that you can not hide
hide
my eyes are opening.

PART 2
thought about the manic laughter
that would escape my lips like
a smothered cry: desperate
and when I tried to cry and couldn't
I bled instead
thought about the distancing of
my self to try to keep safe
I went so far it felt like
giving up when I came back-once more-
the bus was broken down
I would sit and smell the asphalt
pick the scabs and wonder when
I could be alone with my misery again
and when I tried to cry and couldn't
I bled instead (thought)
I can feel the anger like a physical boil
I will pop it with a sterile pin and
watch resentment ooze out
I have no excuses anymore
I could hear them all monotone and smelling
stagnant waiting to be exposed for the liars
they are
and when he pulled up my sleeves and
stared at my mistakes
I knew the idea that I could hide my violence
would be bothered as a result.

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